Why can't I put on weight?

Wednesday 1 August 2001 
I am in a shocking mood today. I have had to help mummy with some new car bizzo for my aunt and I have not slept a wink all morning. I had playgroup this afternoon but I was such a grouch that we had to leave early. Mummy says that I am not myself.

Mummy bought a book on teaching me to sleep and now she thinks that she can rest easy but I know better. I like to sleep in her arms and no book is going to change my mind.

Thursday 2 August 2001 I weigh 4.13 kgs

My bad mood persists even though I slept a tiny bit better last night, I have worked out that if I don’t sleep properly during the day I really do not feel very good. Today I just feel very bad and I cry every time I am not in mum’s arms. Come to think of it I am crying even when I am in her arms. 

I think I can sense that mum is a bit edgy because today is weigh day at Dr C.

Well, I am still the skinny baby that I have always been. Granted I have hit the 4kilo mark but I am still very thin and not putting on weight fast. Dr C has suggested that we go and see a paediatric dietician and a speech therapist of all things. The dietician will give me a high calorie diet once I start to take solids and a speech therapist might be able to teach me to take a bottle.

Mummy asked Dr C about my constant waking at night and he said at my weight I should just eat whenever I am hungry and there is very little that we can do about her having to be up all night if I wont take a bottle. Mmmm maybe I will but only when I am ready.

I had a terrible evening. I screamed a lot and I sobbed and cried real tears. Mummy was also crying.  A LOT


Friday 3 August 2001

Today mummy panicked about me again. She thought that I was developing a rash so she shlepped me off to her GP. He said that it was a heat rash and that maybe I should just wear less layers. Mummy tends to stack on the layers because I have no body fat. Dr T asked about my general well being and suggested to mummy that it may be a good idea to check whether I have any absorption problems as I eat so much and don’t put on any weight. Mummy jumped at that idea and now she has to take in a sample of one of my poos for them to check for fat absorption. How utterly humiliating.

Friday night dinner at my house again and I slept through it. Gee it is strange how I sleep through those parts and then am awake the whole night when there are no visitors around.

Saturday 4 August 2001

Mummy and daddy have rings under their eyes. In fact they even have bags under their eyes all because I can’t sleep at night – I am just too hungry.

It is no use sitting around the house and moping about the tiredness so we all went off to Centennial Park this morning for breakfast and a walk. I was still in a bit of a bad mood and screamed a lot  in the car but eventually I fell asleep. After our walk we went for a long drive and I slept the whole way. Unfortunately the way back was a different story but then again you can’t expect to keep me in the car all day. When we got home mum dragged my chair outside and tried to make me sit outside for a while – she thought that the fresh air might help me sleep tonight – ha ha ha.

Another very long night tonight. Mum and dad tried to put me in their bed so that mum would not keep having to get up but I was not sure what I was meant to do in their bed. I get the eating part but I was just not crazy about the sleeping part, in fact I find it far more comfortable to sleep in my cot, albeit for short periods of time.

Sunday 5 August 2001

I went on a real outing today.  Mummy and daddy took me in the car for a drive to Darling Harbour and I had a long sleep in the car. When we got there they transferred me ever so gently to my pram so I could continue my sleep. When I woke up I found my cousins and aunts and uncle!  Cool find!  

I sat in my pram facing forwards and sitting up like a real big person. It was a huge step for mummy to take to face me outwards because I know that she likes to watch me all the time that she pushes me. I felt so much better after a long sleep and I really enjoyed my outing.

My parents went to bed sooo early tonight. They are exhausted, I don’t think that they can keep up with me. They tried to put me in their bed again but I did not want to sleep there. It was another one of those feed every two hours nights!!

Monday 6 August 2001

We went for an early morning walk today – mum is insisting that I sleep during the day and I am insisting that I will not sleep in my cot. We walked around Centennial Park and I did not sleep at all, I saved that for the shopping trip after the park – I have got to the stage where I can keep mum out all day just because she wants me to sleep.

This afternoon I sat outside while mum taught me to weed the garden and sweep. It was cool. Then sleep time again and so another walk. I am not that fussed on all these sleeps so I have taken to power napping – I sleep for a few minutes and then wham I am at it again.

My new thing is that I can really scream. I think that I have discovered my temper and boy can I use it. When I do not get my own way instantly (because I invariably get it at some stage) I scream so much that my voice goes hoarse – nice trick. My mum HATES it.

Tuesday 7 August 2001

Today we went to the Growth and Development Clinic and I impressed the socks off them!!. I had been in a particularly bad mood in the morning and mum was a bit worried that I would not show off all my skills but boy did I turn on the charm. I was only meant to have my first assessment at 4 months corrected but I went today at 3 months and 17 days corrected and I did all the things that a 4 month old would do. I smiled, I chatted, I grabbed a toy, I rolled from my tummy to my back and I chatted and chatted and chatted. I heard the developmental paediatrician saying “there is no problem with his brain” and over and over again they kept saying that my development was brilliant. Mum was blushing with pride and when she told daddy over the phone he smiled so much the phone lines almost lit up.

There was one point however which everyone keeps nagging me about – the stupid bottle. The doctor at the clinic did say that I was very underweight. She was a bit concerned until she tracked my growth on a special chart that they use for premature babies and then she said that although it is low the upward trend is consistent. The only time that my weight really did a downward turn and veered right off the charts was when I was still in hospital. She did say however that it is very hard for mummy to have to feed me every two hours and as I need to eat that often for the moment I must learn to take a bottle. We will see about that. She also suggested to mummy that I may have a lactose intolerance and that is why I make such explosive poos so often. I am going to have a test to see whether that is true or not.

All in all mummy and daddy were very happy. Mum has also decided to put me back on the Zantac as she had stopped it about a week ago and I have been very crabby so I am back on it and for the first night in ages I slept really well – 6-11, 11:30 – 3:00, 3:30 - 5:00 and then 5:45 – 6:45. It was a BRILLIANT night.