Day Seven - Foray into Modelling

E is more active today. While this could be considered a good thing in normal circumstances it is rather distressing for his parents who do not know the difference between active and distressed. This "active" looks decidedly distressed. The nursing staff assure us that “all babies cry”. Um, yeah we know that. It's just that normally when babies cry their parents can pick them up and comfort them. I want to hold my baby so badly but all I can do is watch and sing to him, read to him and cry.

On the up side E managed to procure his first modelling shoot today. His doctor has developed a new phototherapy light eye mask, he has designed this itsy bitsy teen weeny (not polka dot) eye mask with an admittedly cute pair of sunglasses drawn on the outside. This is just a prototype and E is trialling it. He seems comfortable and looks like a super model (and I don't say this just because he has absolutely no body fat).

E is breathing above vent rate and everybody is happy with his progress. When I say everybody - I mean everybody in the medical field. We would like to fast forward 2 months.

Tonight we were forced to go and have dinner with the family. It was not the highlight of my day. I like to stay next to E's cot and sing and stare at him. We came to see him after dinner and he was fantastic, settled and calm. I would like to think it was not the fact that he had no-one droning on in his ear that allowed him to feel so settled. He is loving sleeping on his tummy and I feel not an inch of guilt about this. He is hooked up to so many monitors and has his own nurse dedicated to looking after him - there is no chance that he will stop breathing in this safe environment.