The worst day in the world. Really

Tuesday 11 September 2001 A bad night’s sleep makes for a long morning nap. I slept all morning today and felt a lot better for it. I know that everyone suggested that uom do the same but she is so stubborn like that so now she will be tired and I won’t be. One day she will learn to sleep.

We went to playgroup at the Newborn Care Centre. We love that outing because we get so much reaffirmation about how well I am doing. Today Sue, the physio who runs the group was just amazed at me. She said that I am looking so big and fat and that while I few months ago I looked like I was not thriving now I look really well. She also said that I am so smart and that I will definitely be the skinny kid who is top of the class. I charmed everyone as usual and did my mother proud. I still continue to get comments from everyone on what a happy baby I am.

Wednesday 12 September 2001

I am sure that most people are noting today or rather yesterday in their diaries. I am writing today because it is the day that I woke up to hear the awful news about the devastation in New York. 

Mum has been trying to put on a very brave face but she looks petrified.  And she is sobbing a lot.  She looks pale. And she keeps hugging me for extra long.  I am hugging her back to tell her how grateful I am to be in Australia and how lucky I am to have my family with me.  Mummy phoned daddy a lot today.  

When he came back from Melbourne this evening I was nearly as pleased as mummy to have him home so I woke often during the night just to check that he was still there and I am pleased to say that he is back to stay – I don’t think mom or I will ever let him travel again.

I know that this may sound pretentious coming from a 7 month old but I am really lost for words at today's events. I wish the families of all those who lost their lives today only comfort, love and hope for a better future free of war, terror and oppression.

Hysterical for the night

Monday 10 September 2001 
I had a great day running around with my aunt and uncle and cousin.

In fact I had a great day till nightfall. Firstly we had been out shopping far too late and by the time we came home it was really late so I was a bit out of sync. I had trouble getting to sleep and then when I woke up for some food at 9pm I noticed that daddy was not there. I thought I would let it rest until the next feed and so I did but then when I woke up he was still not there. 

Everybody had neglected to tell me that daddy was away on business for two nights. My night was ruined, I was a wreck. Mummy tried to put me in her bed, she tried to rock me, she tried to hold me but all I did was cry. I cried and I cried and I screamed and I screamed and I cried some more. 

I think I heard mummy’s heart break, I know she was not in the happiest mood. Eventually she thought that I was in some pain so she gave me Panadol. I slept for an hour and woke up again. It was a terrible night and when mummy had come to her senses all I could hear her doing was praying for the sun to come up because everything is always a lot better in the light of day.

What a riot - I get to sleep all the way to the airport and back

Sunday 9 September 2001 
This morning mum and dad shlepped me off shopping again. I am convinced that every time I don’t sleep very well they take me off shopping in the morning. I am sure that they think I will sleep if I am pushed around in the pram for long enough but really there is so much to see and do I am not sure that sleeping in my pram would not mean that I miss out on some other stuff.

We went out for lunch again but I did not get banana this time. Mum spoke about leaving me with dad and my cousins while she went with Dan to the airport but I was so tired and we all know that when I am that tired I only want my mum so I ended up going with her to the airport to get my aunt Ca. I was as good as gold because I knew that the adults would want to talk so I slept all the way there and I slept all the way back, it was almost as if I had stayed at home I was so quiet.

I had another one of my wonderful nights from hell. Mummy is convinced that the tapping me in the cot business is not working and I am not learning to sleep any better. Now I will not fall asleep in her arms and I will not fall asleep in my cot so it is a bit of a nightmare to get me to sleep.  Oh well

I have fallen for a banana

Saturday 8 September 2001
I had a wonderful day today. I slept like a charm last night added to which I had a good long nap this morning and so I was in a really good mood today. Needless to say my parents were also pretty delighted.

I also had the joy of discovering bananas. I was sitting with the family eating lunch at my aunt when mum thought that instead of eating my hands all the time maybe I should taste a banana. Well all I can say is I love banana !!! If they had wanted me to eat sooner they should have introduced this yellow piece of heaven earlier. I gummed on my piece of banana for ages and was most impressed with the taste and texture. Mum and dad are hysterically happy and even gave me banana and apple mush for dinner.

After lunch we all went to Centennial Park for some fresh air and exercise. I was still in a good mood and having lots of fun playing but mum and dad are so strict about that routine of mine so we left at 4:30 to go home and get ready for the night time routine. Gee I feel like such a nerd getting ready for bed at such an early hour.

Finger sucking

Friday 7 September 2001 
Today was a much better day than yesterday although I regret to inform that I cannot write about any long sleep. My mood was however ever so much better than yesterday. 

Mummy is now buying me every teething ring that she can find because I am constantly shoving my fists into my mouth and sucking my fingers ravenously. I am also very fond of sucking other people’s fingers if they give me half a chance. This freaks mum out a bit because I am quite indiscriminate about whose fingers I suck. 

Narky mood. Again

Thursday 6 September 2001
I was in a particularly bad mood today and mummy thinks it is because she let me cry a bit last night instead of cuddling me to sleep. In any case I never got enough sleep so today was basically a series of short sleeps with me trying to make up for my lack of proper rest last night.

We went to playgroup at the hospital this morning and I was really not into it. First I slept and then when I woke up I just whinged a lot. We went for a walk afterwards and I fell asleep in my pram in the cutest position ever. I am the only baby that I know that really cuddles up when I sleep in my pram, I wish I could work out a way to cuddle in my cot because then I am sure I would sleep a lot better.

The rest of my day was boring really and apart from my really narky mood today I have nothing much else to report. Hopefully tomorrow I will be writing about the long sleep that I had.

I passed my blood tests. Gosh I am clever

Wednesday 5 September 2001 
This morning mum put me down to sleep in my cot and I was really cross, in fact I was screaming cross. I screamed and screamed but all she did was pat my back and say sshhh. I got so bored I fell asleep and had a long two hour morning nap. Mum was happy, she thinks she is well on her way to teaching me to put myself to sleep. I must say that I woke up in a very good mood and I spent a good half an hour watching my mum dance around the room while I giggled tremendously, that mum she will do anything to make me laugh.

In the afternoon we had mother’s group. I fell asleep on the way there and had another little nap once we were there so now mum is worried about the night again. Tanya came up with a theory as to why I don’t sleep – she said that mum is so nice to me that I don’t want to spend any time apart from her. Mum is really flattered with that one.

When we got home there was a message on the phone from Dr C. He said that my calcium phosphate levels were all fine and there was nothing to worry about at all. Pheww! I passed my blood tests.

Tonight when I went to sleep mummy let me fall asleep on my own. She did not wrap me fully because she thought she should leave out one hand for me to suck on. It is about time too, I spent such a long time learning to suck my fingers in order to calm me down and now she takes that away from me at night by wrapping my hands up. 

I don't eat pears

Tuesday 4 September 2001 After another very tiring nights sleep I was in a bit of a mood this morning but nothing that could not be overcome with a long breastfeed or two. We went to my aunt and I didn't eat my pears there. Every day mummy feeds me food and every day I don’t eat it.

Today was the day mum had long been planning to take me to music lessons – “Baby Music on the Lap”. We had been once ages ago when I was only 4 weeks corrected and I loved it then even though I fell asleep. Anyway when we got there I was really tired so after the first song when I had the opportunity to lie in mum’s arms, I fell asleep and I awoke promptly as the lesson ended. Mum thought it was a terrible waste of money but dad said he would willingly pay someone to make me sleep.

In the afternoon we went to fetch my cousin from school and she introduced me and mum to her teacher. Her teacher said that I was the happiest baby she ever saw and had to check with mum a couple of times if I was always that happy. Yup mum said, I am, even at 2am!!

Another terrible night. I was awake a lot and I found it very hard to go to sleep. I heard mum say that she is determined to teach me to go to sleep on my own. This should be interesting.

Mummy is still crying

3 September 2001

Today we met Tanya and Jake for a walk around Centennial Park. Tanya said that mummy looks stressed. I think maybe she can see in mummy’s face that I have not been sleeping such a lot at night. I think I confused Tanya though because I fell asleep in my pram like such a star and now she thinks that I can put myself to sleep any old time. The problem was though that I only fell asleep for about 15 minutes which is really not enough. 

I could not sleep at all well during the night either and I woke up at 11 and could not get back to sleep till 2am. Mummy was crying because she was so tired, I don’t understand it I was not at all tired, on the contrary I wanted to play.